Dream Gold
En bref
Online Dating
Date de début
18.03.2022
Date de fin
20.03.2022
Cette rencontre concerne le groupe
- Le collectif Citoyens en action
Description de l'activité
Surviving a Long-Term Affair and Saving a Marriage
Transforming Communication and Parenting in a Troubled Marriage
Healing a Marriage by Confronting Insecurities and Building Trust
Religious Differences and Strengthening Marriage Bonds
The Affection Gap: Bridging Emotional Distance in a Long-Term Marriage
Workplace Dating Detours
When Blind Dates Go Wrong
Comfort Vs. Fulfillment In Modern Dating
Demanding Respect and Openness in a Relationship
Get Outta My Dating Pool
Seeking Clarity and Connection in Dating
Gym Flirting 101
Finding Balance in Love After Loss
I am one of those people who dreams every night. I usually remember my dreams when I wake up in the morning too, which I know is even more rare. Lately though I haven’t been sleeping too well and my dreams have tapered off. I missed them, like a long lost friend, and was so glad when they returned the other night. However, the dream that I recall most vividly from the night was pretty disturbing. I woke up, grabbing my ever present thought journal, and wrote down as many details as I could remember with the knowledge that I HAD to blog about it.
Every now and then I have a dream that my friend Jacki and I have coined, “Dream Gold”. An example of which is when we were rooming together at a friends destination wedding in Key West and left the sliding glass door open to the fresh ocean air. We woke in the morning, turned to each other and said, “You have to hear about my dream.” At the same exact time…laughed…then both said, “you first.” Haha. I’d had the most vivid dream of a man who had trained his capuchin monkey to climb up the balconies and rob tourists who had slept with their doors open. She had a dream of a half insect half bird being hopping around her parent’s kitchen, with that sensation that everyone else knew what it was and she was clearly crazy for not knowing. We both laughed at our grain alcohol induced “dream gold”.
So ladies and gentlemen here is my dream gold from other night.
I was in a restaurant/bar with my friend Jesse just talking and drinking our beer. I was drinking a Miller Lite in hopes of looking down to earth and approachable and not too long into said dream two men walked up to us and started to chat us up. I know that my man was attractive but not so attractive as to be intimidating. Jesse and her man turned into each other at the table leaving my man and myself feeling as though we were at our own private table. We spent a good amount of time exchanging pleasantries and laughs. I was pretty happy about the way things were going here.
Sound familiar? I am pretty sure up until now this was a play off my experience the other night with the “180 degree Guy” (if you haven’t read it you really must—I’d love your take on it). So here I am talking to this guy and Jesse is still talking with her man and I excuse myself to use the restroom. I walk back out to find the atmosphere in the place had completely changed (as it can only in dreams). The room has changed into a candle lit restaurant with long tables. So I find my party, which had doubled with the addition of other random people I know, and settle into my chair.
Oddly, when I sat back down I thought to myself, “Wow, this guy doesn’t look as good as he did before. Is it the new lighting?” Perplexed I looked for my drink only to see my man, left hand extending a Miller Lite to me, and realize…he is wearing a wedding ring! In the words of my young cousin, WTF!!?? This guy did NOT have a wedding ring on earlier. I scowl at him and since he now is sitting across the table from me, and next to Jesse, I let it go, sip my beer and throw Jesse a pleading look (which she misses).
Suddenly I am overcome by the cloying scent of cologne, overpowering horrible cologne. I should point out that I LOVE cologne on a man…but the right cologne and not used to replace a shower, but to accentuate his natural manliness. Anyway, this cologne is choking me; my eyes are watering and I can taste in my throat (you know what I’m talking about). He catches my watering eyes and says, “Don’t you like it? It’s the new Calvin Klein.” I should note here that I have no idea what Calvin Klein cologne smells like but I’m sure it’s wonderful. So before I realize it he whips out his bottle of cologne and sprays it in my face. That’s right…in my face.
I am sputtering and coughing, drinking beer to wash away the alcohol and hideous scented liquid and wiping my watering eyes. I blink my eyes open to see Jesse snatch the bottle from his hand and walk towards a trash can that has magically shown up in the middle of the room. Said trash can is a little distance away and I’m telling Jesse to stop and come sit down. I tell her it’s not a big deal we can just leave. Meanwhile Captain Cologne gets up to follower her telling her she should “rethink throwing that away”; which is when I see him un-holster a gun and hold it down at his side.
Yup…the guy is packing heat. Now I’m starting to wonder if this dream wasn’t a combination of horrible dates…and this was the representation of Stephen the crazy online dating experience. Hmmm?
I get Jesse to come sit back down, Captain Cologne puts his gun away and Jesse never even knows that her life was in danger. I plaster a saccharine sweet smile on my face and tell this man I’m leaving. He gets VERY mad at this. I respond that I’m not interested because he is married. He responds by saying, “What do you care? I still have plenty to give you. We can naughty text and have phone sex.” Oh…I swoon at such an offer!
I tell him with the same sweet smile plastered on my face that I have no interest in a married man, that he should have told me that off the bat, and that I can get more pleasure from my shower head than his dirty texts. Red in the face and yelling so hard he’s spitting on my face he tells me that I have been “throwing myself at him all night and should stop being such a dick tease.” He also stated that I had “no right to be so picky”. Let me tell you he’s really earning his way into my pants with comments like this.
You know it’s a dream because in real life this guy would have had my foot embedded in his taint so hard he’d be coughing blood…but nope…I sat there calmly and sweetly and told him, “Yes, I am putting myself out there though why I bother when the world is full of men like him I don’t know.” I also tell him, “I’m okay being picked up by men, I’m even okay being “test driven” but I am not okay with married men…or crazy men packing heat.” I say this and Jesse’s eyes bug out of her head. She stands and starts backing up towards the door. He’s paying no attention to him though; he is focused only on me. I stand up and blow him a kiss as I walk out of the bar with Jesse.
I can’t help but want to pick apart my dreams…and this one screams of recent dissatisfaction in my relationships. A conversation that leads nowhere…Mr. 180 Degrees. A crazy guy with a gun…Stephen. A married man…EK and others. I just happened to get them all rolled up into one with Captain Cologne. Oh well. Luckily it was just a dream…but really…can’t I even get a nice guy in my dreams?! Even in my subconscious I can’t find the right guy. You’d think I would be having hot crazy sex on the hood of a car with Jason Statham…but no! My dreams are mocking me.
The fact that I said in my dream that I was “putting myself out there” and “okay being picked up by men and being test driven” got to me though. Sure I am open to getting out there and meeting somebody but…test driven? Where did that come from? It reminds me of a used car lot…and there I am. What would I be? A dependable sedan…a Honda maybe? I am not a Kia or a Daewoo…I keep my value and am dependable…but I am aware I’m not a Jaguar or Lamborghini.
I see myself sitting there on the lot sporting a sign that says something like, “Gently used, some damage; as expected for a 30 yr old model, lots of years left in the old girl, requires loving attention and minimal maintenance. Serious offers only, no haggling, no changes…what you see is what you get.”
So is it to be expected that a couple guys will have to come and “test drive” me before I find my buyer? I can’t help but wonder, if I keep putting myself out there if somebody will eventually come along and decide that it’s worth the risk to take me off the lot for good. Oh well…this was my crazy ass dream and the thoughts that it provoked…just wanted to share.
Transforming Communication and Parenting in a Troubled Marriage
Healing a Marriage by Confronting Insecurities and Building Trust
Religious Differences and Strengthening Marriage Bonds
The Affection Gap: Bridging Emotional Distance in a Long-Term Marriage
Workplace Dating Detours
When Blind Dates Go Wrong
Comfort Vs. Fulfillment In Modern Dating
Demanding Respect and Openness in a Relationship
Get Outta My Dating Pool
Seeking Clarity and Connection in Dating
Gym Flirting 101
Finding Balance in Love After Loss
I am one of those people who dreams every night. I usually remember my dreams when I wake up in the morning too, which I know is even more rare. Lately though I haven’t been sleeping too well and my dreams have tapered off. I missed them, like a long lost friend, and was so glad when they returned the other night. However, the dream that I recall most vividly from the night was pretty disturbing. I woke up, grabbing my ever present thought journal, and wrote down as many details as I could remember with the knowledge that I HAD to blog about it.
Every now and then I have a dream that my friend Jacki and I have coined, “Dream Gold”. An example of which is when we were rooming together at a friends destination wedding in Key West and left the sliding glass door open to the fresh ocean air. We woke in the morning, turned to each other and said, “You have to hear about my dream.” At the same exact time…laughed…then both said, “you first.” Haha. I’d had the most vivid dream of a man who had trained his capuchin monkey to climb up the balconies and rob tourists who had slept with their doors open. She had a dream of a half insect half bird being hopping around her parent’s kitchen, with that sensation that everyone else knew what it was and she was clearly crazy for not knowing. We both laughed at our grain alcohol induced “dream gold”.
So ladies and gentlemen here is my dream gold from other night.
I was in a restaurant/bar with my friend Jesse just talking and drinking our beer. I was drinking a Miller Lite in hopes of looking down to earth and approachable and not too long into said dream two men walked up to us and started to chat us up. I know that my man was attractive but not so attractive as to be intimidating. Jesse and her man turned into each other at the table leaving my man and myself feeling as though we were at our own private table. We spent a good amount of time exchanging pleasantries and laughs. I was pretty happy about the way things were going here.
Sound familiar? I am pretty sure up until now this was a play off my experience the other night with the “180 degree Guy” (if you haven’t read it you really must—I’d love your take on it). So here I am talking to this guy and Jesse is still talking with her man and I excuse myself to use the restroom. I walk back out to find the atmosphere in the place had completely changed (as it can only in dreams). The room has changed into a candle lit restaurant with long tables. So I find my party, which had doubled with the addition of other random people I know, and settle into my chair.
Oddly, when I sat back down I thought to myself, “Wow, this guy doesn’t look as good as he did before. Is it the new lighting?” Perplexed I looked for my drink only to see my man, left hand extending a Miller Lite to me, and realize…he is wearing a wedding ring! In the words of my young cousin, WTF!!?? This guy did NOT have a wedding ring on earlier. I scowl at him and since he now is sitting across the table from me, and next to Jesse, I let it go, sip my beer and throw Jesse a pleading look (which she misses).
Suddenly I am overcome by the cloying scent of cologne, overpowering horrible cologne. I should point out that I LOVE cologne on a man…but the right cologne and not used to replace a shower, but to accentuate his natural manliness. Anyway, this cologne is choking me; my eyes are watering and I can taste in my throat (you know what I’m talking about). He catches my watering eyes and says, “Don’t you like it? It’s the new Calvin Klein.” I should note here that I have no idea what Calvin Klein cologne smells like but I’m sure it’s wonderful. So before I realize it he whips out his bottle of cologne and sprays it in my face. That’s right…in my face.
I am sputtering and coughing, drinking beer to wash away the alcohol and hideous scented liquid and wiping my watering eyes. I blink my eyes open to see Jesse snatch the bottle from his hand and walk towards a trash can that has magically shown up in the middle of the room. Said trash can is a little distance away and I’m telling Jesse to stop and come sit down. I tell her it’s not a big deal we can just leave. Meanwhile Captain Cologne gets up to follower her telling her she should “rethink throwing that away”; which is when I see him un-holster a gun and hold it down at his side.
- not as cowboy at this...but you get the idea.
Yup…the guy is packing heat. Now I’m starting to wonder if this dream wasn’t a combination of horrible dates…and this was the representation of Stephen the crazy online dating experience. Hmmm?
I get Jesse to come sit back down, Captain Cologne puts his gun away and Jesse never even knows that her life was in danger. I plaster a saccharine sweet smile on my face and tell this man I’m leaving. He gets VERY mad at this. I respond that I’m not interested because he is married. He responds by saying, “What do you care? I still have plenty to give you. We can naughty text and have phone sex.” Oh…I swoon at such an offer!
I tell him with the same sweet smile plastered on my face that I have no interest in a married man, that he should have told me that off the bat, and that I can get more pleasure from my shower head than his dirty texts. Red in the face and yelling so hard he’s spitting on my face he tells me that I have been “throwing myself at him all night and should stop being such a dick tease.” He also stated that I had “no right to be so picky”. Let me tell you he’s really earning his way into my pants with comments like this.
You know it’s a dream because in real life this guy would have had my foot embedded in his taint so hard he’d be coughing blood…but nope…I sat there calmly and sweetly and told him, “Yes, I am putting myself out there though why I bother when the world is full of men like him I don’t know.” I also tell him, “I’m okay being picked up by men, I’m even okay being “test driven” but I am not okay with married men…or crazy men packing heat.” I say this and Jesse’s eyes bug out of her head. She stands and starts backing up towards the door. He’s paying no attention to him though; he is focused only on me. I stand up and blow him a kiss as I walk out of the bar with Jesse.
I can’t help but want to pick apart my dreams…and this one screams of recent dissatisfaction in my relationships. A conversation that leads nowhere…Mr. 180 Degrees. A crazy guy with a gun…Stephen. A married man…EK and others. I just happened to get them all rolled up into one with Captain Cologne. Oh well. Luckily it was just a dream…but really…can’t I even get a nice guy in my dreams?! Even in my subconscious I can’t find the right guy. You’d think I would be having hot crazy sex on the hood of a car with Jason Statham…but no! My dreams are mocking me.
The fact that I said in my dream that I was “putting myself out there” and “okay being picked up by men and being test driven” got to me though. Sure I am open to getting out there and meeting somebody but…test driven? Where did that come from? It reminds me of a used car lot…and there I am. What would I be? A dependable sedan…a Honda maybe? I am not a Kia or a Daewoo…I keep my value and am dependable…but I am aware I’m not a Jaguar or Lamborghini.
I see myself sitting there on the lot sporting a sign that says something like, “Gently used, some damage; as expected for a 30 yr old model, lots of years left in the old girl, requires loving attention and minimal maintenance. Serious offers only, no haggling, no changes…what you see is what you get.”
So is it to be expected that a couple guys will have to come and “test drive” me before I find my buyer? I can’t help but wonder, if I keep putting myself out there if somebody will eventually come along and decide that it’s worth the risk to take me off the lot for good. Oh well…this was my crazy ass dream and the thoughts that it provoked…just wanted to share.